Even more frightening than having a president who believes in Jesus is the prospect, all too real at for several tense moments during last night’s installment of 60 Minutes, of seeing Mike Wallace’s Botoxed old man’s smirk causing his his face to crack on national TV.

This looked like a real possibility during Mr. Wallace’s interview with Bob Woodward — who has demonstrated beyond the shadow of a doubt in his new book, Plan of Attack, that a total moron inhabits the White House. Wallace grimaced and mugged so much that it seemed that a lot of really expensive plastic surgery was in danger of having to be redone.

Wallace believes, based on the Woodward book, that the President, who has an IQ somewhere between that of a grapefruit and Maureen Dowd, believes himself to have been told by God to spread democracy to the world.

“It’s not in the Constitution, is it?” Wallace asked incredulously. He was dripping with sarcasm and — omigod — raising his eyebrows.

No, it’s not in the Constitution.

And President Bush doesn’t think it is.

I plan to read Woodward’s book — he’s a great reporter who, because of who he is, can get anybody to talk.

But my plan of attacking it is to realize up front that Messrs. Woodward and Wallace are hindered from interpreting certain kinds of information by their provinciality. I will jump to fewer conclusions than they do.

For example, I do not believe that a president who believes in God and who also hopes to establish a stable government in Iraq is ipso facto a religious fanatic driven by messianic deams of world dominion.

Woodward and Wallace appear to. 

Woodward and Wallace seemed most distraught by the president’s disdainful attitude towards today’s “intellectuals.”

Well, when you consider that we live in a world where Mr. Wallace is considered a leading member of the intellectual-opinion elite set, you can see where the disdain is coming from, can’t you?

But the shocking revelations weren’t finished.

Mr. Woodward recounted how, as he walked Bush to the door of the Oval Office, he asked the president how history will judge him.

Bush said that he didn’t know and that, at any rate, we’ll all be dead by the time history judges.

This really, really got Woodward: Shouldn’t Bush be sitting in the Oval Office fretting about what people, dead or alive, think of him? Shouldn’t he be pondering his legacy? Shouldn’t he apologize for slavery or something? He’s is more concerned with trying to do the right thing in tough times. 

What a moron.