Reader J.P. comments on this blog-autobio by the conflicted, oh-so-politically correct father who hates that his kids’ former nanny took them to church on Sunday (horrors!) and had a drug-dealing boyfriend–but won’t let his wife be a stay-at-home mom like the first wife he ditched (see “Nanny Diaries,” Oct. 2):
“What do I think of the neurotic politically correct father? I think that it’s a good thing he won’t let his wife stay home because his demands for her would be at least what he demands for nannies, and it’s no wonder his first wife ended up ‘evacuated.’ He’d require her to be the perfect mother if she took on that role. Perfect mother and also perfect wife to him. At least this way she only has one of those burdens.”
You said it, J.P. Read the post. Read how it’s all about me. Read how the worst feature of the nanny was that the 4-year-old bonded with her instead of his mother–which made him made, but that was OK, because:
“My wife — for whom this is a serious, daily, issue — periodically decides to boot the nanny-o’-the-moment and immerse herself totally in care-giving. I convince her not to do so. I don’t want my wife to make a change, because I want life-after-childhood for her, and with her. Each day, I want her to have a few hours to dream, screw around, plan, create. Otherwise, I am afraid she will emerge from that first period of intense mothering so drained of herself that I will have lost my wife, in some material ways, forever”
Yes, not the child, not his mother. Me.