Tomorrow is Halloween. If you don’t have a costume yet, don’t panic. The Department of Energy has you covered.
DOE has compiled a list of five homemade costumes to promote energy efficiency with your friends, family, and neighbors.
It’s not a joke or a trick. Someone at Energy actually thought this was a good idea and a good way to promote the clean energy agenda and environmentalism. As they note on their website, “Here at Energy.gov, we take Halloween seriously — very seriously.”
What won’t be taken seriously is your reputation if you actually show up to the office or Halloween party wearing one of those outfits. There’s nothing wrong with a homemade costume, but when it’s promoting an agenda, it seems forced and inauthentic.
Here are their homemade costume recommendations:
1. Solar Panel – Be a solar panel by duck taping and tying cardboard pieces together. As a Bonus, they recommend asking a friend a dress up as the Sun and spend the night basking in your glow.
2. Ernest Moniz – Show your appreciation for the nuclear physics-loving Secretary of Energy Ernest Moniz. All you need is a powered “Founding Father” wig, suit & tie, and a 348-page copy of Quadrennial Energy Review. Best Dressed, here you come!
3. Energy Vampire – Throw a cape on, slip in some fans and sling charges and charging cords around your shoulders, then you can suck the energy out of the party all night. You'll such the fun out as well.
4. Particle Accelerator – Particle what? It beats us too but if you run LED lights on a hula-hoop and attach it to your suspenders, you can simulate “the chaos of the universe moments after the Big Bang.” What if you believe in creationism?
5. Wind Turbine – You can wear white after Labor Day with this “majestic costume” which entails wrapping your body in white sheets and using foam poster board wings and helmet. You’ll look more like a whale than a turbine, but at least you’ll get conversations going.
Are our tax dollars really going towards bureaucrats sitting in a room and thinking up Halloween costumes? Apparently, they are.
According to its website the mission of the Energy Department is to “to ensure America’s security and prosperity by addressing its energy, environmental and nuclear challenges through transformative science and technology solutions.”
Of all of the energy issues we face as a nation, Halloween costumes are not top of the list, but I guess they are for the Energy Department. For the rest of us we’ll focus our attention on the less important concerns such as securing our domestic sources of energy, protecting access to energy sources overseas, and exploring new ways to find energy.