The revolution may not be televised–but it will be mandatory!

That's the message radical students at Columbia University are giving their classmates who would rather play Frisbee than attend a demonstration, or who decide that black–the required protest color for campus attire these days–makes them look fat.

You didn't know that Columbia was having student protests? You thought that was Mizzou and Yale? Silly you–Columbia is having a solidarity protest! That's where you decide that students at some other campus are suffering so badly from microaggressions that you walk out of your classes, too.

And because not a lot of your fellow students are all that interested in getting involved in other people's ideological battles–well, you pressure them!

That's what's happening at Columbia right now, according to the New York Post:

Columbia student activists are pestering peers to attend campus protests and walk-outs in solidarity with college students at Missouri and Yale or risk social isolation, students say.

Organizers posted flyers and sent Facebook messages inviting undergraduates to wear black clothing and join two demonstrations last Thursday to support people of color who are “marginalized and threatened.”

But some students worried they would be “ostracized” if they did not participate or dress in sync, one college parent said.

“There’s been a campaign of intimidation, where students are going dorm to dorm, floor to floor and asking students to go back to their dorms and put on black if they’re not wearing black,” the parent said….

Hundreds of Columbia students gathered at the South Lawn Thursday, and some speakers heckled bystanders who did not participate.

“Look at those guys playing Frisbee — that is the definition of privilege,” said one speaker.

The students stopped playing Frisbee and left the area.

And not only do you have to be in solidarity with other students–you've got to be in solidarity with criminals who aren't even students:

Another student wearing a T-shirt with the words “Kill White Supremacy” called Columbia a “white supremacist institution.”

She led the crowd in a progression of chants including “I love black people,” “I love all black people” and “I love queer black people,” before adding “I love black criminals” and “I love black people who steal.”

“Raise your hand if you’re a little bit uncomfortable,” she said as a smattering of hands went up.

“It’s okay if you’re uncomfortable right now. This university was built on stolen land on the backs of            my ancestors — and that is uncomfortable.”

I like the "small smattering of hands." Apparently only a few students at this $60,000-a-year Ivy League campus actually think there's something wrong with looting a store.

Meanwhile, at the University of Missouri, student activists are reportedly upset that the public is paying more attention to the Paris massacres than to their grievances. One of the many tweets posted reads: "Not to take away from Paris but just how they're getting news coverage & the worlds support we deserve it too."

The university says the posts were “made by individuals from outside the Mizzou community in an attempt to create conflict.”

Hmm, maybe they came from Columbia.