On this week’s special episode, we pause to honor those who served this country and paid the ultimate sacrifice in doing so. Emily Domenech, the co-founder of #TheHonorProject, joins to share about the efforts she and thousands of volunteers take on each year for Memorial Day to remember our fallen. She also explains how you can become a volunteer.
Emily Domenech is the co-founder of the Honor Project, a Travis Manon Foundation service project to honor fallen service members on Memorial Day. Emily is a military parent and stepmother of three, and has served in federal and state government for 15 years. She currently holds the position of Senior Policy Advisor to House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy, and previously served in the same role for Ranking Member Frank Lucas on the House Committee on Science, Space, and Technology. She also serves as a U.S. Navy Reserve Officer.
TRANSCRIPT
Beverly Hallberg:
And welcome to She Thinks, a podcast where you’re allowed to think for yourself. I’m your host, Beverly Hallberg. And thank you for joining me on this special episode, where we stop to honor those who served this country and paid the ultimate sacrifice in doing so. I’ll be speaking with Emily Domenech, who is the co-founder of The Honor Project. She’s going to explain the efforts she and thousands of volunteers take each year on Memorial Day to remember our fallen and also we’ll let you know how you can become a volunteer.
Before we bring her on, a little bit more about Emily. Emily Domenech, as I mentioned is the co-founder of The Honor Project. She is a military parent, stepmother of three, and has served in federal and state government for 15 years. She currently holds the position of Senior Policy Advisor to House Minority Leader, Kevin McCarthy, and previously served in the same role for Ranking Member, Frank Lucas on the House Committee on Science, Space and Technology. Finally, she serves as a US Navy Reserve officer. Emily, thank you for joining us and thank you so much for your service as well.
Emily Domenech:
Thank you so much for having me. I’m really excited to be here.
Beverly Hallberg:
And so this is a wonderful project. Again, it’s called The Honor Project. This is something that you do on Memorial Day. Before we get into all the details of that and how people can get involved, this is part of the Travis Manion Foundation. I was hoping you could give us some information, first of all, on the foundation.
Emily Domenech:
Absolutely. So the Travis Manion Foundation was founded by Ryan Manion in honor of her brother, Travis Manion, who was killed in 2007 in Iraq. He served as a Marine, went to the Naval Academy and she wanted to found this organization to sort of represent his mantra in life, which was very much, “If not me, then who.” He wanted to honor service of many people who sacrificed to give Gold Star Families a place to reconnect with the veteran community and to give veterans an opportunity to serve in their community.
So, one of the things I love about the Travis Manion Foundation, which is why I connected with them on The Honor Project, was that they have an incredible network of volunteers. Veterans, Gold Star Families, people who want to just serve other veterans. And they have chapters all across the country and they do incredible service projects and community outreach projects really everywhere. So if you are interested in getting involved in serving with veterans or you’re a veteran yourself or a member of a Gold Star Family, I really could not recommend an organization higher than them. I think they do a fantastic job of helping folks find community and connection, especially when they’ve gone through loss. It’s really, really incredible. And Ryan is a wonderful person.
Beverly Hallberg:
Yeah, there’s so much they do for Gold Star Families, you mentioned they have lots of projects. The Honor Project being one of them. It’s coming up on Memorial Day is the day that you and other volunteers honor those who have given the ultimate sacrifice. So tell me how long ago did you co-found this project and what exactly does it do on Memorial Day?
Emily Domenech:
So The Honor Project is one of those wonderful things that sort of happened by chance. And that’s one of the things I love about it. So in 2020, when Arlington Cemetery was closed down due to COVID, only family members, direct family members of people who were buried in Arlington were allowed into the cemetery. My grandfather is buried there. He served for 30 years in the United States Army. He was an Army Colonel when he retired, served in World War II, Vietnam and Korea. And I visit his grave every year on Memorial Day and Veteran’s Day. And because I knew that so many people, particularly on Memorial Day you see a lot of folks who come in who are visiting their battle buddies, people they served with, who were killed in action, and I knew none of those people would be able to get into the cemetery.
So I just sent out a Tweet and said, “Hey, if you want somebody to visit a grave on your behalf, let me know.” And I thought of a handful of my friends who are veterans, who I know, know people who are buried in Arlington. And I thought I’d get a handful of responses. And over the course of the day, I had probably thousands. I think I visited just shy of 70 graves while I was in Arlington that day. But the interest really was not just people who couldn’t get in because they were not family members, but frankly, people from all over the country who have relatives buried at Arlington. There are thousands and thousands of graves at Arlington Cemetery. And most people can’t afford to travel there every year on Memorial Day. So I knew after that first year, I knew that this was a project that would have meaning to people long past the COVID lockdowns that kept people out of the cemetery that first year.
So I had a good friend who was on the board of the Travis Manion Foundation and I knew about their work already. And I knew they had this incredible network of national volunteers and they were the perfect partner to work on with this project. So last year we worked together. Travis Manion helped find volunteers. They helped host a whole group of people at Arlington Cemetery. And we had, I think, 300 volunteers and we visited 4,000 graves last year. So really incredible growth from just one person running around with no plan. I was just thrilled to see how well we did last year and we’re doing the same thing again this year. So we’ll have several hundred volunteers at Arlington Cemetery, but we’re also expanding to six other sites around the country, to military cemeteries that host similar fallen service members to do the same thing.
So there will be projects in Jacksonville, Colorado, California, Pennsylvania, at West Point in New York. And that’ll give our volunteers around the country who want to be… And one more in Kansas. Apologies, I forgot that one. That will give volunteers from all around the country, the chance to go on Memorial Day with their family to learn the name of a service member, to visit their grave, to take a photograph and share it on social media.
And part of what I love about this project is that it’s valuable for the volunteers who are there on the day to take those photographs and visit those graves. It’s valuable for the family members who have someone visit their loved one when they can’t, when they maybe live across the country and can’t make it. And then, it’s valuable for people who can just follow along on social media and see our hashtag. It’s #thehonorproject and see those photographs and read the names of the fallen when they take a moment on their Memorial Day weekend. So it’s a really incredible multi-layered project that I hope, frankly, we at some point, can expand to cemeteries all across the country.
Beverly Hallberg:
What is it like when you do, let’s say tag something on social media or reach out to a family personally, what kind of responses have you gotten the past two years? Maybe a family that knew you were going to be there, maybe a family that was surprised. What do you hear in response?
Emily Domenech:
It’s really incredible. So the first year I connected with a number of people who had unique stories. One in particular that I always remember is a woman who reached out to me, who said, “I want you to visit my husband’s grave, but I don’t know if he has a headstone yet because he was only buried in January.” And I actually was the first person to visit his headstone, because it had been put up in the month before and no one had had the opportunity to go. So I was… Captain Ryan Phaneuf. I visited his grave every year. I visit it every time I go to Arlington Cemetery now, and I’ve stayed in touch with his family a little bit through social media over the past two years.
And I think what’s interesting about that is, one I’ve been able to follow his family as they’ve gone through their grieving process. They started a fund to raise money for kids in their town for scholarships in his name. And I really feel like I know him in that family because I’ve spent so much time making sure that people remember his name and his story. And I always link to his obituary every year, because I feel like it’s not just visiting a grave, it’s getting to know a person. And that’s one story that’s always stood out to me.
One of the things I decided to do this year in Arlington, we get requests from people all over the country, but I still have this big list of people from 2020 of graves that I didn’t visit from my original Tweet. And one of the things I’m planning to do this year is to go back to every single one of those graves to make sure they’re visited again this year. To make sure that people can see them on social media and to hopefully share a few of their personal stories. I think that’s the most important part.
Beverly Hallberg:
And I know you said that you started doing this because you wanted to visit your grandfather and it just built from there. What has it meant to you or when you talk to other volunteers, who’ve decided to do this, what does it mean to actually not just remember those lives lost, but get to know them, get to know their families? Does it make you think about this country in a different way? What value does it bring?
Emily Domenech:
So I’d say two things. One, I think it’s reminded me that most Americans, despite everything we hear on social media and on the news and the things that make the world seem like a dark place, most Americans really, truly want to honor the service member, the people who serve to honor the people who wear the uniform and to show that respect and honor in some way. But the truth of it, is most Americans don’t know how, I mean, only 1% of Americans serve in the United States Military. It’s a very, very small community in a big country. And I think you typically see, particularly on Memorial Day when everyone knows this is about those who are killed in battle, people don’t know what to do. And they’re looking for an opportunity to teach their children about those who sacrificed and to do something that gives value to the rest of the country.
And what I love about The Honor Project is I really do believe it’s just as valuable for those volunteers as it is for the families of the fallen. Because they can take a moment, a small moment out of their Memorial Day weekend, take a break from going to their barbecue or going shopping or any of the things we do where we are fortunate enough to have a long weekend in this free country, and honor those who served. And they want to do that. We filled up our volunteers the first year of The Honor Project in a week. And I think, part of the reason we look to expand is because there was so much interest. And I just think that’s a wonderful thing.
The other thing I would say is, nothing is too small. It may seem like a really small thing to go volunteer on something like this and spend two hours on Memorial Day in a cemetery. But it means a immense amount to the Gold Star Families and service members. Last year was truly the most moving thing to me to on Memorial Day, we had volunteers in the cemetery all weekend and on Memorial Day, we got to meet with some of the families of the graves we had visited. And they expressed such gratitude because they said, “We walked up to this grave and we saw the flag plaque left by your volunteers and we knew someone had already been there.” And like, that’s incredible. You can’t beat that.
Beverly Hallberg:
Yeah. Well, before I continue my conversation with you, Emily, just want to let our listeners know that there is a podcast that you should check out. And so here’s my question for you. Are you a conservative woman? Do you feel problematic for just existing in today’s political landscape? Well, every Thursday morning on “Problematic Women,” Lauren Evans and Virginia Allen sort through the news to bring you stories and interviews that are of particular interest to you, a Problematic Woman, that is someone who has opinions that are often excluded or even mocked by those on the so-called pro-women left. Lauren and Virginia, break down the news you care about in an upbeat and sharp witted way. Search for “Problematic Women,” wherever you get your podcasts.
Now, Emily, I’m going to pick up something you just said. You said you put a flag out there. I think I read somewhere that you all hand make, I don’t know if it’s the flags or something else that you leave there. What all do you do? I know there’s the photo part, but what are some of the specifics?
Emily Domenech:
So our volunteers, when they get to the cemetery in the morning, they will get a list of names of graves that they need to visit. At each grave they’ll visit, and this year we’re actually doing a wooden coin, but you can see it behind me. Last year, we had a wooden flag that we left at every grave. This year, it’s slightly smaller. It’s more of a coin, but it’s made by a group called Flags of Valor. That’s a veteran owned company in Virginia that produces plaques and memorials for exactly projects like this. So they were an ideal group for us to partner with for this project. But that way our volunteers will visit the grave, they’ll read the name, they’ll leave the coin at the grave, they’ll take a photograph and then they’ll share it on social media with the #thehonorproject.
Beverly Hallberg:
That’s awesome. And I know that there’s something new that you were adding, you have now the option for families to submit their hero, name of their loved one. It’s a way to help people honor their loved ones. Tell me a little bit about that project.
Emily Domenech:
So there’s a platform. If you go to travismanion.org, it’ll pop right up where if you are a Gold Star Family, or frankly, a family member of a service member, who’s buried in Arlington, you can go, you can submit the name. If you have the grave location of your loved one, you can put that in there and you can request a visit from one of our volunteers. So someone will get their name and go and visit them on Memorial Day weekend. And you can know that that name… And frankly, when they share the name on social media, we make sure that if you went and searched on Twitter for your loved one’s name, you’d be able to see a photograph of their grave. So it’s a way for again, I see it very much as like family members… Travel is expensive. We know how high gas prices are right now. Nobody’s has been able to make these big trips and we want to make sure that that doesn’t mean you don’t get to honor your loved one.
Beverly Hallberg:
Well, final question for you. I know that there are lots of people listening to this episode who may want to volunteer. So you even mentioned this has gone beyond Arlington Cemetery. You have cemeteries across the country where this is going on. If people want to get involved, what can they do?
Emily Domenech:
So they should go to travismanion.org. You’ll see a popup for The Honor Project when you get to the website and then you can put in your zip code and it’ll actually tell you which projects are closest to your home. Our main projects, as I mentioned, are in Jacksonville, in Colorado and Pennsylvania, Kansas, and in San Diego. And then of course at Arlington Cemetery. But truthfully, if you’re not able to volunteer with The Honor Project, I still really on Memorial Day weekend, I really encourage you to visit travismanion.org because they are doing projects all over the country, almost certainly in your community. And it’s a wonderful group of people to get to know, and to connect with. And we’d love to have you as a volunteer this year or in future.
Beverly Hallberg:
All right. Well, Emily Domenech with The Honor Project, we so appreciate all that you do to honor our heroes. And also thank you so much for joining us on She Thinks.
Emily Domenech:
Thank you so much for having me.
Beverly Hallberg:
And thank you all for joining us. I do want to let you know, before you go, the Independent Women’s Forum does rely on the generosity of supporters like you. An investment in IWF fuels our efforts to enhance freedom, opportunity and wellbeing for all Americans. So please consider making a small donation to IWF by visiting iwf.org/donate. That’s iwf.org/donate. Last if you enjoyed this episode of She Thinks, do leave us a rating or review. It does help. And we’d love it if you shared this episode, so your friends can know where they can find more She Thinks. From all of us here at Independent Women’s Forum, thanks for watching.
