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Her “Extremely Feminine” Granddaughter Suddenly Identified as a Boy—and Carla Cook is Fighting to Save Her

By Ashley McClure


When Carla Cook* thinks back to the moment her 11-year-old granddaughter, Allie*, came out as transgender, she recalled that it felt unnatural. Around the same time that Cook’s son and Allie’s mother got divorced, Cook’s once “extremely feminine” granddaughter began questioning her gender identity.

[Allie] has been horribly traumatized by the battle between her parents,” Cook said. “There have been numerous trials, court hearings, years of therapy, and testifying in court.”

Cook, who works in the healthcare field, recalled that Allie’s transformation was immediate and startling. “Allie was very feminine until about 24 months ago,” she said. “But then, she started only listening to dark, hard-rock music. She became sullen and angry, and she would not talk to me about what was going on.”

Cook believes that the divorce and its traumatizing aftermath were the catalyst for Allie’s social transition and adoption of the male name “Ryan.” But, she said, the foundation of her granddaughter’s gender confusion was laid years before. 

Cook’s son Caleb* is a special warfare combatant-craft crewman in the United States Navy and served two tours of duty in the Middle East when Allie and her sister were young. As such, Allie spent a great deal of time alone with her mother, Crystal*, who came out as bisexual when Allie was just five years old. 

“[Allie]’s parents divorced and [Crystal] exposed the girls to a string of boyfriends and girlfriends,” Cook said. When Allie was five, Cook remembered her granddaughter “proudly” telling her she was a lesbian. She continued:

“I didn’t react and just asked her, ‘Oh, do you know what that means?’ She said, ‘Mommy said it’s when a girl loves a girl.’ She went on to have her little boyfriend and it never came up again.”

Her mother’s example was reinforced by much of the media Allie consumed as a child.

“I believe that all children that live in today’s society are exposed to the woke agenda of gender fluidity—it is included in cartoons, TikTok, television shows, and movies,” Cook said. “Both of [Allie’s] parents have promoted an obsession with anime, and I now know that these ideals are heavily promoted in that style of animation.”

Cook believes that Allie’s discomfort with her body developed shortly after she began puberty at an earlier age than any of her peers. 

“A few months after she turned nine, Allie confided in me that she started her period. I was shocked,” Cook said. “Her mother said that she had taken [Allie] to the doctor and they could not find a reason. That’s the last I heard of it, and when I asked Allie if she was still getting her period, she said she didn’t want to talk about it.”

When Allie started to identify as transgender, Cook said that Crystal supported Allie’s gender confusion and hid her new identity from Cook and Caleb.

“We live in Redding, California. You may be familiar with the case of the 11-year-old girl that was transitioned in the Chico Unified School District without the knowledge of the parent,” Cook said. “Our case is a little different from the CUSD case. Apparently, my ex daughter-in-law has been aware that this has been happening for quite some time, but my son and I were just recently informed.”

Caleb, on the other hand, wanted to “get to the root cause of why Allie became depressed in the first place.”

“[Allie]’s father, my son, is completely against this,” Cook said. “He believes that Allie’s stated desire to be a boy is really a symptom of depression.”

However, Cook said that her son was powerless to help Allie with her underlying depression for several years. The court originally awarded Allie’s mother full legal custody after she “used his military service against him,” calling him a “trained killer.” 

“I was the court-appointed supervisor for three years,” Cook said. “I have filmed numerous times when the girls have been reunited with their father, only to see them run into his arms bawling their eyes out because of how much they missed him.”

Cook explained that she became the court-appointed supervisor after her son refused to plead guilty in court, resulting in his loss of all parental rights. 

“​​At first, my son’s father and his paternal grandmother were also [court-appointed supervisors], but they couldn’t keep themselves from telling-off my ex daughter-in-law and she had them removed from the list,” Cook said. “I’m the only one that kept my mouth shut and played her game. I knew that if I didn’t, she wouldn’t let me supervise, and then nobody would get to see those precious girls. I did that every other weekend for three years.”

Although Caleb has recently regained the right to unsupervised overnight visits every other weekend and two nights a week, Allie now refuses to speak to him because he is committed to referring to her as his daughter. Cook, however, still speaks to Allie, and hopes to “remain a positive moral influence in her life.”

“I have a feeling that there is a common theme in parents promoting the trans lifestyle to their young children,” Cook said. “I know that young children will do anything to gain the approval of their parents. What is happening in our society is unforgivable.”

*To protect the identity of each individual mentioned and the integrity of the ongoing custody battle, all names in this story have been changed.

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